Today’s debate pairs perfectly with dip and is better than any chip. It’s Broccoli vs. Carrots! Listen as comedian, voice actor, and writer Mary Mack battles for team Broccoli while actor and improviser Jada Pulley charges for team Carrots! Who will be crowned the Smash Boom Best? Vote below for the team YOU think won!
Also… do you have your Smarty Pass yet? Get yours today for just $4/month (or $36/year) and get bonus episodes every month, and ad-free versions of every episode of Brains On, Smash Boom Best, Moment of Um and Forever Ago. Visit www.smartypass.org to get your Smarty Pass today. As an added bonus, your Smarty Pass will grant you access to a super special debate starring Sanden and Molly!
Audio Transcript
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MOLLY BLOOM: From the brains behind Brains On, it's Smash Boom Best.
MARY MACK: The show for people with big opinions.
MOLLY BLOOM: Hi, I'm Molly Bloom. And this is Smash Boom Best, the show where we take two things, smash them together, and ask you to decide which one is best.
Today's debate pairs perfectly with dip and is better than any chip. Get ready for some appetizing action because it's broccoli versus carrots. We've got comedian, voice actor, and writer Mary Mack here to battle for Team Broccoli.
MARY MACK: Broccoli for you, broccoli for me, broccoli for the victory.
MOLLY BLOOM: [LAUGHS] And we've got actor and improviser Jada Pulley here leading the charge for Team Carrots.
JADA PULLEY: I love carrots, and I'm here to declare it.
MOLLY BLOOM: And here to judge it all is Kathryn from Roseville, Minnesota. Kathryn loves oysters, water-skiing, hip hop dance, and her two cats and two dogs. Hi, Kathryn.
KATHRYN: Hi, Molly.
MOLLY BLOOM: So, Kathryn, I hear there might be a mini debate going on in your family-- tubing versus water-skiing.
KATHRYN: Oh, yeah.
MOLLY BLOOM: What side are you on?
KATHRYN: I'd have to say I'm on tubing. It's just fun to fall off, and actually, the struggle of holding on. Though water-skiing is also can learn more about it, and it's more advanced, I guess, and fancy, but I prefer tubing.
MOLLY BLOOM: So why is it a debate in your family? Who's on the water-skiing side.
KATHRYN: Well, my mom really likes water-skiing, and she is-- actually was a water-skiing instructor. So every time somebody comes up to her cabin, she always tries to get them to water-ski, even if they don't want to. It's a whole thing. Oh, come on water-skiing. You'll love it. And I always say, you don't have to. Come tubing. Join us, join us. Come tubing.
MOLLY BLOOM: So you're about to start high school.
KATHRYN: Yes.
MOLLY BLOOM: What do you think the biggest difference is going to be between middle school and high school?
KATHRYN: I think it's just going to be way more people. There's going to be so much more people than there was in the middle school. And we're going to have around 100 kids now, which doesn't seem like a lot, but it's a lot of kids for our small school. And then the homework.
MOLLY BLOOM: Do you have any advice for our debaters today?
KATHRYN: I'd say just remember your notes, and good luck.
MOLLY BLOOM: Excellent advice. Will Kathryn side with Mary or Jada? Only time will tell. But first, let's review the rules of the game. Every debate consists of four rounds-- the Declaration of Greatness, the Micro Round, the Sneak Attack, and the Final Six.
After each round, our judge, Kathryn, will award points the team that impresses her the most, but she'll keep her decisions top secret until the end of the debate. Listeners, we want you to judge, too. Mark down your points as you listen. At the end of the show, head to our website, smashboom.org, and vote for whichever team you think won. OK, Mary, Jada, and Kathryn, are you ready?
JADA PULLEY: I was going to say, I was born crying, and I became ready.
[LAUGHTER]
MOLLY BLOOM: All right. We are definitely ready for our first round. It's time for the Declaration of Greatness. In this round, our debaters will present a well-crafted immersive argument in favor of their side. Then they'll each have 30 seconds to rebut their opponent's statements. We flipped a coin. And Mary, you're up first. Tell us why broccoli is a mean green machine.
MARY MACK: [ITALIAN] That's "welcome, everyone" in Italian. Why Italian? Because today I'm proclaiming the greatness of an early Italian invention known as broccoli. Italy is a powerhouse when it comes to cool design. Italians have given the world incredibly sleek products, like stylish Prada sunglasses, Armani suits, Gucci purses--
[PURSE RUSTLING]
CREW: Excuse me. Is that a dog in your purse?
MOLLY BLOOM: Let's see. Ciao.
[DOG BARKING]
MARY MACK: --dreamy sports cars, like Lamborghini and Ferrari--
[CAR RACES BY]
--and cappuccinos and macchiatos.
CREW: Hey, I said hold the pumpkin spice. This is real coffee. Café forté.
MARY MACK: Well, what if I told you you could carry in your lunchbox something made with a style and class of Italian design for only 1/1000 of the price of a Gucci bag? Yes, you can carry broccoli. It's the Lamborghini of vegetables.
Broccoli is a classic Italian invention. It was developed by the horticultural geniuses of ancient Italy, the Etruscans. They engineered it over 2,000 years ago from selectively planting wild cabbage, only the cabbage with the biggest floral bloom, year after year till the floral bloom became the food. That's right.
Cabbage wasn't classy enough for the Etruscan Italians, so they invented broccoli. Etruscans were also some of the most respected bronze sculptors in ancient times, so they knew how to make a good-looking vegetable.
[WHISTLING]
The lush green broccoli tops are called florets. If broccoli goes unpicked in the garden, the florets bloom into delicate yellow flowers. I feel like Royalty, knowing I'm fancy enough to eat flowers for dinner.
CREW: Oh, I see you're eating broccoli, Your Highness, Princess Mary. I apologize. I had no idea I was dining with a royal.
MARY MACK: No, dude, it's me, regular Mary. Even us commoners can eat broccoli's fancy flowers. But I'm down if you want to address me with a curtsy or pay me unfair taxes. That's cool.
CREW: Hmm. I'll think about it.
MARY MACK: And folks, broccoli doesn't just look good. It sounds good, too. Broccoli is the swanky plural form for the Italian "broccolo," meaning the flowering crest of a cabbage. Meanwhile, you can't say carrot without saying "rot," R-O-T. It's right in the name.
Broccoli is also a very giving veggie. Every part of the plant can be consumed. Its leaves are particularly nutrient-rich. The stalk and stems can be shredded to make broccoli slaw. That's like coleslaw but actually desirable to eat.
Broccoli's bloom makes it excellent at scooping up and enhancing dips and hummus. And don't forget, you can make the meal of meals, the tastiest soup on planet Earth, the substance I would choose to course through my veins if I couldn't have blood, broccoli cheese soup.
[APPLAUSE, CHEERING]
Many historians think the Etruscans in northern Italy were some of the first gladiators. You know, those legendary athletes known for sparring to the death in various now-illegal competitions, like bear fighting, chariot races, and warm breadstick jousting? Mmm, smells great.
Are these complimentary? And what were they eating, those gladiators? Lots of vegetables like broccoli, because broccoli contains blood- and heart-strengthening nutrients, like iron, vitamin B and vitamin C, and cancer-fighting, eyesight-improving antioxidants, and loads of fiber to keep it easy-breezy in the bathroom.
CREW: Yeah, we could use a little breeze in this bathroom. Light a match.
MARY MACK: Without a power-packed meal of broccoli, gladiators would have just been "sadiators." Remember, when you get your next veggie craving, you'll be among a smart, and stylish, and inventive sector of history in choosing broccoli over any other vegetable. In closing, I would just like to reiterate three very important words and then drop the mic and leave-- broccoli cheese soup.
[MIC DROPS]
Thank you.
MOLLY BLOOM: Brava! [ITALIAN] Kathryn, what stood out to you about Mary's Declaration of Greatness?
KATHRYN: I think I had no idea that "rot" was in carrot. Now, that's a tough one to beat.
[LAUGHTER]
I was Team Carrot before this, but I don't know. I don't know. It's going to be a tough one. And that it has iron and cancer-fighting ingredients in it, that's amazing.
MARY MACK: Also, Kathryn, did I tell you how nice you look today?
KATHRYN: Wow, thank you.
[LAUGHTER]
MOLLY BLOOM: Oh, my gosh.
KATHRYN: Wow.
JADA PULLEY: Flattery. I'd encourage you to stick to your roots that you came in with.
MARY MACK: Wow.
JADA PULLEY: And not to fall for those brocco-lies.
MARY MACK: Maybe wants to branch out.
MOLLY BLOOM: Oh, my gosh. All right, Jada, it is time for your rebuttal. Tell us why broccoli is a vulgar vegetable. You've got 30 seconds. And your time starts now.
[CLOCK TICKING]
JADA PULLEY: I would like to say that while broccoli is a nutritious vegetable, carrots are just as nutritious, and they're actually delicious. Do you know that former president, the 41st president of the United States, George H.W. Bush, is notoriously on record for saying that-- basically, as soon as he became president and had power to not eat broccoli, he refused.
He hates broccoli. And he's not the only one. It's like known in--
MOLLY BLOOM: And--
JADA PULLEY: Dang it. I forgot there's time.
[LAUGHTER]
I should have been faster. I have so much more broccoli hate to spread.
MOLLY BLOOM: Mary, anything you'd like to respond?
MARY MACK: Ah, have you ever tried to put a load of dip onto a carrot? It's pretty tough. But look at how much dip you can stick on the wide span of a broccoli head, so much dip.
MOLLY BLOOM: OK, that's a false-- you can easily scoop things with carrots.
KATHRYN: I mean, shouldn't they be good without dip? Like, shouldn't the original be good?
MARY MACK: Oh, yeah, it is good. But broccoli is just a giving vegetable. And he wants to help dip.
KATHRYN: OK, OK, OK.
MOLLY BLOOM: All right. Carrots stand on their own-- all right.
MARY MACK: They're good with dip.
MOLLY BLOOM: OK, it's your turn. Jada, tell us why carrots are the root we should root for?
[MUSIC PLAYING]
JADA PULLEY: I'm backstage getting amped for my improv show.
CREW: We've got 15 minutes, Jada. Help yourself to anything in the mini fridge.
[FRIDGE DOOR CLOSES]
JADA PULLEY: Thanks. I always get snacky pre-show. I don't want anything heavy, just a crunchy, sweet, healthy treat. Ugh, what is that smell? A dead opossum? The farts of a million sleeping dogs? Oh! Steamed broccoli. To the trash, tiny, stinky trees. Back to my snack quest. Wait, is that a bag of baby carrots?
[HEAVENLY MUSIC]
Forget chocolate bars and salt water taffy. I want carrots. Vegetable candy. Carrots have a fresh fruity flavor, a delightful crunch, and more sugar than almost every other vegetable. Who doesn't like sweet and healthy?
[FLY BUZZING]
I'm obsessed with carrots. Who are you? I'm the carrot fly. We're a species of fly that loves carrots so much we were named after them. Our little wormy babies feed on carrots. Awesome. Too bad there's no such thing as a broccoli fly.
I guess no one wants to be named after bitter wannabe trees. You know who else loves carrots, Carrot Fly? Bugs Bunny. That's right, doc. In real life, carrots are too sweet for rabbits to eat every day. But they're not too sugary for humans. Their delicate, lightly sweet flavor makes them the best vegetable for delivering dips to your lips.
Carrots' mild flavor makes them the perfect veggie companion to ranch, hummus, blue cheese, Thousand Island, babaganoush, guacamole, and more. Americans eat a staggering 8 to 12 pounds of carrots per person every year and only about 4 to 5 pounds of broccoli. Have you tried driving a broccoli bus, smothered in French dressing into your mouth hole. It's like driving a tree into your face.
[LOUD THUD]
Time for a baby carrot.
CREW: That carrot is not a baby.
JADA PULLEY: It's the carrot parrot.
CREW: It's the carrot parrot.
JADA PULLEY: If this carrot isn't a baby, what is it?
CREW: Baby carrots are grown-up carrots that have been peeled and cut down to similar size. I know because I'm obsessed with carrots. They're a healthy snack for us parrots. Chewing them strengthens our jaws, and they are great for our eyes.
JADA PULLEY: Carrots are good for human eyes, too. That's because they're filled with something called beta-carotene, which is a pigment that gives carrots their orange hue. Our bodies turn beta-carotene into vitamin A, which helps our eyes take in light.
And carrots have over 20 times more beta-carotene than broccoli. Pro tip, if you really want to get the most out of a carrot, cook them. Your body can absorb vitamin A even more easily from hot carrots.
CREW: Hot carrots? Umm.
JADA PULLEY: Carrots can take the heat.
[SIZZLING]
And they don't just come in orange. They come in purple, red, yellow, and white, too. So go ahead. taste the carrot rainbow.
CREW: Hey, Jada, you're almost up. Are you still looking for a pre-show snack?
JADA PULLEY: Always.
CREW: Well, I baked this broccoli cake last night, and I'm looking for taste testers.
JADA PULLEY: Broccoli cake?
CREW: Hey-hey. Just kidding. Can you imagine? No, it's a carrot cake with cream cheese frosting.
JADA PULLEY: Phew! Yes, please. I'll enjoy a slice or five after the show. Carrots, they're nature's candy. They taste great raw, cooked, and baked goods, and dressed up in dip. And they're awesome for our bodies. I hope you're rooting for carrots to win this one, because let's face it, carrots take the cake.
MOLLY BLOOM: A delicious argument for carrots. I hope you won't mind sharing some of your carrot cake after the show. Kathryn, what stood out to you about Jada's Declaration of Greatness?
KATHRYN: I always heard that they helped your eyes. I didn't know how that worked. Teachers would always say to me, eat your carrots. You'll be-- you won't need glasses ever if you eat them. But now, actually learning about the carrot beta-carotene in the carrots, that actually makes sense why they help your eyes. Wow.
MOLLY BLOOM: Very cool. All right, Mary, it is time for your rebuttal. Tell us why carrots make nasty nibbles. And your time starts now.
MARY MACK: I pose to you that the smell of broccoli is actually an innate safety protocol saying, hey, don't forget you're cooking me on the stove. You don't want to burn the house down. Carrots don't even care. You can't smell a carrot. You could burn anything down with a carrot.
And then secondly, carrots, they might help your eyes. But it's a whole underground scheme they got going. You can poke your eye out with a carrot because it's so sharp. And then, ironically, you need more carrots to help your eyes. It's a vicious cycle. That's how they get you. I'm over my time.
CREW: What? We'll give you points for creativity. And that was straight up [? broccolies. ?] Like, carrots will not poke out your eyes.
MARY MACK: This is getting heated.
MOLLY BLOOM: This is a tough debate today. Kathryn, please give one point to the Declaration of Greatness you like best. and one point to the rebuttal that won you over. You get to decide what makes a winning argument.
Did one team's jokes make you laugh? Was the other team's argument unbeatable? Award your points, but don't tell us who they're going to. Have you made your decision?
KATHRYN: Yes, I have.
MOLLY BLOOM: Excellent. Jada and Mary, how are you two feeling so far.
MARY MACK: I'm nervous. I like carrots a little better now.
JADA PULLEY: Wow, you heard it here, folks.
MARY MACK: But also, my love for broccoli runs deep. And if I ever could be a spokeswoman for broccoli, I wouldn't even charge broccoli.
JADA PULLEY: That's really sweet of you. But broccoli cheddar soup running through your veins-- I'm lactose intolerant.
MARY MACK: Well, that's a whole-- that's another problem.
JADA PULLEY: I know.
MARY MACK: I'm so sorry.
JADA PULLEY: Too bad there's not as many dishes that broccoli would fit in good for. Carrots have so many that they could choose from.
MARY MACK: But I heard about all those dips you like. And think of how much more dip you can get on the broccoli for the babaganoush. Man.
JADA PULLEY: But at what cost?
[LAUGHTER]
MOLLY BLOOM: All right. It is time for a quick break. Head to your garden on a little culinary quest.
KATHRYN: And we'll be right back with more Smash Boom Best.
MOLLY BLOOM: You're listening to state of debate, home to rage and rhetoric and awe-inspiring argumentation.
TAYLOR LINCOLN: Hey there, debatinators. This is Taylor Lincoln, reigning queen of rebuttals. And here I am with my favorite rebut head, Todd Douglas.
TODD DOUGLAS: That's me. Taylor, have I told you about my new favorite reality show, Kitchen Stink, where blindfolded contestants have to identify the ingredients in stinky meals?
TAYLOR LINCOLN: Only about 643 times since yesterday. Why?
TODD DOUGLAS: Well, I wanted to show you this clip from last night's episode. It's got a really great example of a logical fallacy.
TAYLOR LINCOLN: Another logical fallacy? PU. Those are stinky mistakes that sabotage your arguments. Roll the tape, Todd.
[TAPE ROLLING]
PACO: OK, Dalton, I've prepared a real nostril tickler for you this round. Tell me what the ingredients. And no peeking.
DALTON: The sniffer is prime chef Paco. I can smell Brussels sprouts. So that means this dish definitely has pickled herring in it. Chefs always combine pickled herring and Brussels sprouts.
PACO: What?
DALTON: Yeah. Maybe it's a rule or something. All three dishes I've sniffed so far have had that combo-- the fishy sprout quiche. those crispy tempura sprout nuggets with herring dip, and that sprout and herring chowder you made. So I'm sure this dish has sprouts and herring, too.
PACO: But do you even smell herring?
DALTON: Well, no, but based on the pattern, I figured out it must be both of them, right? A rule is a rule. herring and sprouts, that's my final answer.
[BUZZER]
TAYLOR LINCOLN: Whoa, sounds like Dalton's argument is what's stinking up that kitchen.
TODD DOUGLAS: Dalton assumed that because he'd smelled pickled herring and Brussels sprouts together in chef Paco's previous dishes, that those two ingredients always go together. That's a classic cluster illusion, making an argument based on a pattern when that pattern could actually just be a coincidence.
TAYLOR LINCOLN: Dalton ignored the evidence right in front of his nose and inside his nose and stuck to that imaginary pattern.
TODD DOUGLAS: I don't know about you, but this is making me hungry. Want a snack?
TAYLOR LINCOLN: I'm not sure if I'm ever going to be hungry again, Todd.
TODD DOUGLAS: Okey-dokey. More anchovy bites for me.
TAYLOR LINCOLN: Yuck. You can have them in a separate table in a different room. We'll see you next time on. Stay up to date.
JOY DOLO: Brains On Universe is a family of podcasts for kids and their adults. Since you're a fan of Smash Boom Best, we know you'll love the other shows in our universe. Come on, let's explore.
[SONIC BOOM]
MARY MACK: Here we are in Brains On Universe, home to my favorite podcasts. Brains On, Smash Boom Best, Forever Ago. I found one. Forever Ago, the history show hosted by Joy Dolo.
[BEETHOVEN SYMPHONY]
MOLLY BLOOM: It was the early 1800s. Beethoven was busy composing new symphonies. Steam powered trains were brand new inventions. And a British naturalist named William Swainson was exploring the jungles of Britain.
MARY MACK: Uh, what a great show. Need more Forever Ago now.
JOY DOLO: Listen to Forever Ago wherever you get your podcasts.
MOLLY BLOOM: Smash Boom Best. You're listening to Smash Boom Best. I'm your host Molly Bloom.
KATHRYN: And I'm your judge, Kathryn.
MOLLY BLOOM: And we love getting debate suggestions from our listeners. Take a listen to this refreshing debate idea from Cal.
CAL: My name is Cal. And I'm from Missoula, Montana. My debate idea is lemons versus limes.
KATHRYN: I love a citrus showdown.
MOLLY BLOOM: We'll check back in at the end of this episode to see which side Cal thinks should win.
KATHRYN: And now it's back to our debate, broccoli versus carrots.
MOLLY BLOOM: That's right. And it's time for round two, the Micro Round.
[DING]
For the Micro Round challenge, each team has prepared a creative response to a prompt they received in advance. For Mary and Jada, the prompt was mascot audition. In this challenge, each side's vegetable must audition to be the mascot of a sports team. Mary went first last time. So, Jada, you're up. Show us why a carrot would make the best mascot.
JADA PULLEY: I heard you're looking for the perfect produce pick to be your team mascot. Look no further than me, a 6-foot talking, walking carrot. Not only am I easy on the eyes, I'm good for them, too. With my beta-carotenes on your side, you'll be able to see victory clear as day.
Unlike most other vegetables, I'm tough and sturdy enough to survive growing underground during brutal winter months. I'm one of the few vegetables that release more nutrients when cooked. So believe me when I say I can take the heat. And I'm even a master of the martial art of karate.
On top of that, people love me. When you want to get someone motivated, what do you give them? A carrot or a stick. That's right, a carrot. The stick is just a bonus. As a food, I can be juice, desserts, dinner, or a healthy raw snack. If I'm that versatile in the kitchen, imagine how dynamic I'll be cheering for your team.
By the way, my signature dance is where I'll get a bunch of my carrot buddies and we make some 24-carat Magic. We show Bruno Mars how it's done.
Anyway, I'm awesome. But don't let it go to my Carrot Top. I'm naturally sweet and truly pretty down to earth. That's where I grow, after all. Go carrots! Don't you like the sound of that? Pick me to be your mascot. We're perfect for each other. Let's be soil mates.
MOLLY BLOOM: Oh, man, I cannot wait to see the 24-carat dance team. Incredible. Mary, it is your turn. How would broccoli audition to be a sports mascot?
MARY MACK: Ciao. I'm broccoli. [ITALIAN] and the mascot you've been looking for. After all, I'm a team player. Use me for dips, hummus, soup, veggie trays. I'll make them all taste better. Put me with cauliflower, cold or hot. It is the toughest job, but I never complain. I simply bring cauliflower up to a higher level than it could reach on its own. You can do it, Cauliflower.
And if I can make cauliflower look good, think how good I can make your team look. Plus, you don't need to buy me a pom poms. My florets are pom poms. I shake them and cheer. Pronto, pronto, rapido, brava! Brava! I am proud. I grow up, up, out of the dirt, symbolic of the upward rise of your team was on your mascot.
Carrot? Ugh, they grow down, down, down [ITALIAN]. Boo. Gladiators, you know, the most fierce athletes in history, they ate broccoli. Need I say more? I will say one little thing more. If you don't like the color of my poms, just let me grow more, and they'll turn into yellow-flowered poms.
Or if you like a different color for your team, I come in white and purple varieties. See? I'm versatile. And I'm here to help your team look and feel their best. Go broccoli! Brava!
MOLLY BLOOM: Oh, man. Built-in pom poms? What a deal? All right, Kathryn, what did you like about those Micro Rounds?
KATHRYN: I never thought of broccoli looking like pom poms. I've only thought of looking like trees. And now I don't think I can ever go back. I'm going to see it, and I'm going to see pom poms. Wow.
But for carrots, again, I had no idea that there was more nutrients when you cook carrots. It's like all the strength just coming out of the carrot when it gets hot. And you get hot while playing in sports teams. Wow. This is going to be a tough one, guys.
MOLLY BLOOM: It is a tough one. But Kathryn, it's up to you. So please award a point. Don't tell us what's going to. Criteria, completely subjective and completely up to you. Have you made your decision?
KATHRYN: I have made my decision, Molly.
[BELL RINGS]
MOLLY BLOOM: Thank you, Kathryn, then it's time for our third round, the super stealthy Sneak Attack. This is our improvised round where debaters have to respond to a challenge on the spot. Today's Sneak Attack is called on Broadway.
Jada and Mary, we want you to come up with a song from a Broadway musical starring your side. Tell us a bit about who's singing, where the song appears in the show, and then sing us a sample of the music.
Is it a love ballad? Is it a solo performed by the lead during the most climactic moment of the show? Or maybe it's the dramatic finale? Jada went first last time. So, Mary, you're up. Take us to Broadway, broccoli style.
MARY MACK: OK, this is a little bit like the sound of music. The heroine and the love interest are in love and celebrating on the hillside, which is designed with different vegetables.
The hills are alive with the sound of broccoli. Don't step on the broccoli, dear. I want to eat it later. I love broccoli, and I love you, but not as much as broccoli.
I understand.
That's one of the big hits of this Broadway musical. It's a love scene.
MOLLY BLOOM: It's beautiful, so beautiful. What is the sound of broccoli?
MARY MACK: Mmm, Sound of broccoli is just a quiet notion--
JADA PULLEY: [BLOWS RASPBERRY]
[LAUGHTER]
MARY MACK: --in the wind that you're going to feel stronger later thanks to a solid digestive system. Thank you very much for reminding me, Jada. You can't survive life unless your GI tract is clean and running smoothly. Thank you, broccoli. Yet another safety protocol I forgot to mention.
MOLLY BLOOM: Excellent work. Jada, now it's your turn. Let's see if your tasty treat can win a Tony.
JADA PULLEY: This is actually from a yet-to-be-released musical. It is the sequel to Les Miserables. In this edition, there's a plot twist where they get to eat carrots. And all of a sudden, they're-- I forget the French for just super ecstatic and happy and healthy. But that's the title of this play, Healthy.
At the turning point, we see a field of carrots or at least the horizon [? whereinst ?] they grow. And they are singing a song together that introduces us to them.
MOLLY BLOOM: OK.
JADA PULLEY: Grow down, grow down, We're healthy for your brain. Grow down, grow down, We'll never need a grave. There's more. I forget the song.
[LAUGHTER]
But yeah, I only saw the musical once so--
MOLLY BLOOM: It's hard to remember.
JADA PULLEY: It's hard to remember, but it goes on.
MOLLY BLOOM: All right, Kathryn, you've heard these two excellent songs.
KATHRYN: I have.
MOLLY BLOOM: They've painted a picture of what these wonderful Tony Award-winning musicals would be like. But it's time to award a point to only one of them. Who is going to get it? Have you made your decision?
KATHRYN: I've made my decision.
[BELL DINGS]
MOLLY BLOOM: Perfect. Then it's time for our final round, the Final Six. In this round, each team will have just six words to sum up the glory of their side. Jada, let's hear your six words for carrots.
JADA PULLEY: Carrots, can't beat this healthy treat.
MOLLY BLOOM: Very good. All right, Mary, it's your turn. Let's hear your six words for broccoli.
MARY MACK: Broccoli cheese soup, broccoli cheese soup.
[LAUGHTER]
MOLLY BLOOM: Wow.
MARY MACK: Thank you, broccoli. I'm feeling great.
MOLLY BLOOM: OK, Kathryn, it is time to award a final point for this Final Six. Have you made your decision?
KATHRYN: Yes.
[BELL DINGS]
MOLLY BLOOM: Are you ready to crown one team the Smash Boom Best?
KATHRYN: I'm ready, Molly.
MOLLY BLOOM: Drum roll, please. The winner is--
KATHRYN: Broccoli.
MARY MACK: Yes! Thank you, Kathryn, so much. Thank you. Sorry, Jada I have some tissue for Jada.
MOLLY BLOOM: Oh, my goodness. Kathryn, what was your favorite moment of the debate today?
KATHRYN: I think it was the songs. I don't know who any of these people are, but I absolutely love it.
MOLLY BLOOM: It's incredible, so good.
MARY MACK: Thank you so much, Kathryn. I had nothing going for me. And now I have this. Thank you. I would like to invite carrots into the victory ring. It may be their only chance. It was a close one.
JADA PULLEY: There's no need to kick carrots while they're down.
MARY MACK: OK, I take it back. You're great.
JADA PULLEY: I was going to say congratulations. There's no other vegetable I'd rather lose to. Honestly, in preparing for this, carrots and broccoli, they're pretty-- broccoli is nutritious. I'll give it that. I do stand by what I said about they're bitter and just not it. But I can see why someone else would be swayed by your arguments.
MARY MACK: Thank you so much, Jada. And I am going to go buy more carrots because I need glasses. And I'm going to try to make it so I don't need as many glasses.
[LAUGHTER]
MOLLY BLOOM: Well, that is it for today's debate battle. Kathryn crowned broccoli the Smash Boom Best. But what about you?
KATHRYN: Head to smashboom.org and vote to tell us who you think won.
MOLLY BLOOM: Smash Boom Best is brought to you by Brains On and APM Studios. It's produced by me, Molly Bloom--
ANNA WEGGEL: Anna Weggel.
MOLLY BLOOM: --and--
ARON WOLDESLASSIE: Aron Woldeslassie.
MOLLY BLOOM: We had engineering help from Michael Osborne with sound design by Aron Woldeslassie Our editors are--
SHAHLA FARZAN: Shahla Farzan.
MOLLY BLOOM: --and--
SANDEN TOTTEN: Sanden Totten.
MOLLY BLOOM: And we had production help from the rest of the Brains On Universe team--
ROSIE DUPONT: Rosie DuPont.
RACHEL BREES: Rachel Brees.
ANNA GOLDFIELD: Anna Goldfield.
NICO GONZALEZ WISLER: Nico Gonzalez Wisler.
RUBY GUTHRIE: Ruby Guthrie.
LAUREN HUMBERT: Lauren Humbert.
JESS MILLER: Jess Miller.
JOSHUA RAY: Joshua Ray
MARC SANCHEZ: Marc Sanchez.
MOLLY BLOOM: --and--
CHARLOTTE TREVOR: Charlotte Trevor.
MOLLY BLOOM: Our executive producer is Beth Perlman and the APM Studios. Executives in charge are Chandra Kavati and Joanne Griffith. Our announcer is Marley Feuerwerker Otto. And we want to give a special thanks to Austin Cross and Taylor Kaufman. Mary, is there anyone you'd like to give a shout out to today?
MARY MACK: Shout out to broccoli. I'm very grateful for broccoli. And no one has helped me in my journey besides broccoli. Thank you, broccoli.
JADA PULLEY: That's very sad. Sorry.
MOLLY BLOOM: I hope you'll share your broccoli cheese soup recipe with us later. And how about you, Jada? Any special shout outs?
JADA PULLEY: I am going to thank carrots for being there for me. I'm a little sad about having lost this argument, so I'm just going to be crying into a bag of baby carrots later. But it's going to feel so sweet. But I would also like to thank my stuffed animal, my unnamed squishmallow, who will be there for me with hugs.
MOLLY BLOOM: The emotional support squishmallow is very important. And Kathryn, any special thanks or shout outs?
KATHRYN: I am not going to thank my vegetable. But I will be thanking my mom and my dad and especially my mom for that insane debate about tubing and water-skiing.
MOLLY BLOOM: Excellent work. Before we go, let's check in and see who Cal thinks should win the lemons versus limes debate.
CAM: I think lemons would win because you can make lemonade out of lemon.
MOLLY BLOOM: If you're between the ages of 13 and 18 and you'd like to be a judge, or if you're any age and you have an idea for a knock-down drag-out debate, head to smashboom.org/contact and drop us a line.
And make sure to subscribe to Brains On Universe on YouTube where you can watch animated versions of some of your favorite episodes. We'll be back with the new Smash Boom Best debate battle next week, surfing versus ice skating. Bye guys.
[THEME SONG]
(SINGING) Ooh, you have the Smash Boom Best
Ooh, put you through the test
Ooh, have the Smash Boom Best
Ooh, better than the rest
It's Samsh Boom Best
It's Smash Boom Best
MOLLY BLOOM: I need to go watch the rest of that musical Lays Healthy.
JADA PULLEY: Lays healthy.
MARY MACK: The show for people with big opinions.
MOLLY BLOOM: Hi, I'm Molly Bloom. And this is Smash Boom Best, the show where we take two things, smash them together, and ask you to decide which one is best.
Today's debate pairs perfectly with dip and is better than any chip. Get ready for some appetizing action because it's broccoli versus carrots. We've got comedian, voice actor, and writer Mary Mack here to battle for Team Broccoli.
MARY MACK: Broccoli for you, broccoli for me, broccoli for the victory.
MOLLY BLOOM: [LAUGHS] And we've got actor and improviser Jada Pulley here leading the charge for Team Carrots.
JADA PULLEY: I love carrots, and I'm here to declare it.
MOLLY BLOOM: And here to judge it all is Kathryn from Roseville, Minnesota. Kathryn loves oysters, water-skiing, hip hop dance, and her two cats and two dogs. Hi, Kathryn.
KATHRYN: Hi, Molly.
MOLLY BLOOM: So, Kathryn, I hear there might be a mini debate going on in your family-- tubing versus water-skiing.
KATHRYN: Oh, yeah.
MOLLY BLOOM: What side are you on?
KATHRYN: I'd have to say I'm on tubing. It's just fun to fall off, and actually, the struggle of holding on. Though water-skiing is also can learn more about it, and it's more advanced, I guess, and fancy, but I prefer tubing.
MOLLY BLOOM: So why is it a debate in your family? Who's on the water-skiing side.
KATHRYN: Well, my mom really likes water-skiing, and she is-- actually was a water-skiing instructor. So every time somebody comes up to her cabin, she always tries to get them to water-ski, even if they don't want to. It's a whole thing. Oh, come on water-skiing. You'll love it. And I always say, you don't have to. Come tubing. Join us, join us. Come tubing.
MOLLY BLOOM: So you're about to start high school.
KATHRYN: Yes.
MOLLY BLOOM: What do you think the biggest difference is going to be between middle school and high school?
KATHRYN: I think it's just going to be way more people. There's going to be so much more people than there was in the middle school. And we're going to have around 100 kids now, which doesn't seem like a lot, but it's a lot of kids for our small school. And then the homework.
MOLLY BLOOM: Do you have any advice for our debaters today?
KATHRYN: I'd say just remember your notes, and good luck.
MOLLY BLOOM: Excellent advice. Will Kathryn side with Mary or Jada? Only time will tell. But first, let's review the rules of the game. Every debate consists of four rounds-- the Declaration of Greatness, the Micro Round, the Sneak Attack, and the Final Six.
After each round, our judge, Kathryn, will award points the team that impresses her the most, but she'll keep her decisions top secret until the end of the debate. Listeners, we want you to judge, too. Mark down your points as you listen. At the end of the show, head to our website, smashboom.org, and vote for whichever team you think won. OK, Mary, Jada, and Kathryn, are you ready?
JADA PULLEY: I was going to say, I was born crying, and I became ready.
[LAUGHTER]
MOLLY BLOOM: All right. We are definitely ready for our first round. It's time for the Declaration of Greatness. In this round, our debaters will present a well-crafted immersive argument in favor of their side. Then they'll each have 30 seconds to rebut their opponent's statements. We flipped a coin. And Mary, you're up first. Tell us why broccoli is a mean green machine.
MARY MACK: [ITALIAN] That's "welcome, everyone" in Italian. Why Italian? Because today I'm proclaiming the greatness of an early Italian invention known as broccoli. Italy is a powerhouse when it comes to cool design. Italians have given the world incredibly sleek products, like stylish Prada sunglasses, Armani suits, Gucci purses--
[PURSE RUSTLING]
CREW: Excuse me. Is that a dog in your purse?
MOLLY BLOOM: Let's see. Ciao.
[DOG BARKING]
MARY MACK: --dreamy sports cars, like Lamborghini and Ferrari--
[CAR RACES BY]
--and cappuccinos and macchiatos.
CREW: Hey, I said hold the pumpkin spice. This is real coffee. Café forté.
MARY MACK: Well, what if I told you you could carry in your lunchbox something made with a style and class of Italian design for only 1/1000 of the price of a Gucci bag? Yes, you can carry broccoli. It's the Lamborghini of vegetables.
Broccoli is a classic Italian invention. It was developed by the horticultural geniuses of ancient Italy, the Etruscans. They engineered it over 2,000 years ago from selectively planting wild cabbage, only the cabbage with the biggest floral bloom, year after year till the floral bloom became the food. That's right.
Cabbage wasn't classy enough for the Etruscan Italians, so they invented broccoli. Etruscans were also some of the most respected bronze sculptors in ancient times, so they knew how to make a good-looking vegetable.
[WHISTLING]
The lush green broccoli tops are called florets. If broccoli goes unpicked in the garden, the florets bloom into delicate yellow flowers. I feel like Royalty, knowing I'm fancy enough to eat flowers for dinner.
CREW: Oh, I see you're eating broccoli, Your Highness, Princess Mary. I apologize. I had no idea I was dining with a royal.
MARY MACK: No, dude, it's me, regular Mary. Even us commoners can eat broccoli's fancy flowers. But I'm down if you want to address me with a curtsy or pay me unfair taxes. That's cool.
CREW: Hmm. I'll think about it.
MARY MACK: And folks, broccoli doesn't just look good. It sounds good, too. Broccoli is the swanky plural form for the Italian "broccolo," meaning the flowering crest of a cabbage. Meanwhile, you can't say carrot without saying "rot," R-O-T. It's right in the name.
Broccoli is also a very giving veggie. Every part of the plant can be consumed. Its leaves are particularly nutrient-rich. The stalk and stems can be shredded to make broccoli slaw. That's like coleslaw but actually desirable to eat.
Broccoli's bloom makes it excellent at scooping up and enhancing dips and hummus. And don't forget, you can make the meal of meals, the tastiest soup on planet Earth, the substance I would choose to course through my veins if I couldn't have blood, broccoli cheese soup.
[APPLAUSE, CHEERING]
Many historians think the Etruscans in northern Italy were some of the first gladiators. You know, those legendary athletes known for sparring to the death in various now-illegal competitions, like bear fighting, chariot races, and warm breadstick jousting? Mmm, smells great.
Are these complimentary? And what were they eating, those gladiators? Lots of vegetables like broccoli, because broccoli contains blood- and heart-strengthening nutrients, like iron, vitamin B and vitamin C, and cancer-fighting, eyesight-improving antioxidants, and loads of fiber to keep it easy-breezy in the bathroom.
CREW: Yeah, we could use a little breeze in this bathroom. Light a match.
MARY MACK: Without a power-packed meal of broccoli, gladiators would have just been "sadiators." Remember, when you get your next veggie craving, you'll be among a smart, and stylish, and inventive sector of history in choosing broccoli over any other vegetable. In closing, I would just like to reiterate three very important words and then drop the mic and leave-- broccoli cheese soup.
[MIC DROPS]
Thank you.
MOLLY BLOOM: Brava! [ITALIAN] Kathryn, what stood out to you about Mary's Declaration of Greatness?
KATHRYN: I think I had no idea that "rot" was in carrot. Now, that's a tough one to beat.
[LAUGHTER]
I was Team Carrot before this, but I don't know. I don't know. It's going to be a tough one. And that it has iron and cancer-fighting ingredients in it, that's amazing.
MARY MACK: Also, Kathryn, did I tell you how nice you look today?
KATHRYN: Wow, thank you.
[LAUGHTER]
MOLLY BLOOM: Oh, my gosh.
KATHRYN: Wow.
JADA PULLEY: Flattery. I'd encourage you to stick to your roots that you came in with.
MARY MACK: Wow.
JADA PULLEY: And not to fall for those brocco-lies.
MARY MACK: Maybe wants to branch out.
MOLLY BLOOM: Oh, my gosh. All right, Jada, it is time for your rebuttal. Tell us why broccoli is a vulgar vegetable. You've got 30 seconds. And your time starts now.
[CLOCK TICKING]
JADA PULLEY: I would like to say that while broccoli is a nutritious vegetable, carrots are just as nutritious, and they're actually delicious. Do you know that former president, the 41st president of the United States, George H.W. Bush, is notoriously on record for saying that-- basically, as soon as he became president and had power to not eat broccoli, he refused.
He hates broccoli. And he's not the only one. It's like known in--
MOLLY BLOOM: And--
JADA PULLEY: Dang it. I forgot there's time.
[LAUGHTER]
I should have been faster. I have so much more broccoli hate to spread.
MOLLY BLOOM: Mary, anything you'd like to respond?
MARY MACK: Ah, have you ever tried to put a load of dip onto a carrot? It's pretty tough. But look at how much dip you can stick on the wide span of a broccoli head, so much dip.
MOLLY BLOOM: OK, that's a false-- you can easily scoop things with carrots.
KATHRYN: I mean, shouldn't they be good without dip? Like, shouldn't the original be good?
MARY MACK: Oh, yeah, it is good. But broccoli is just a giving vegetable. And he wants to help dip.
KATHRYN: OK, OK, OK.
MOLLY BLOOM: All right. Carrots stand on their own-- all right.
MARY MACK: They're good with dip.
MOLLY BLOOM: OK, it's your turn. Jada, tell us why carrots are the root we should root for?
[MUSIC PLAYING]
JADA PULLEY: I'm backstage getting amped for my improv show.
CREW: We've got 15 minutes, Jada. Help yourself to anything in the mini fridge.
[FRIDGE DOOR CLOSES]
JADA PULLEY: Thanks. I always get snacky pre-show. I don't want anything heavy, just a crunchy, sweet, healthy treat. Ugh, what is that smell? A dead opossum? The farts of a million sleeping dogs? Oh! Steamed broccoli. To the trash, tiny, stinky trees. Back to my snack quest. Wait, is that a bag of baby carrots?
[HEAVENLY MUSIC]
Forget chocolate bars and salt water taffy. I want carrots. Vegetable candy. Carrots have a fresh fruity flavor, a delightful crunch, and more sugar than almost every other vegetable. Who doesn't like sweet and healthy?
[FLY BUZZING]
I'm obsessed with carrots. Who are you? I'm the carrot fly. We're a species of fly that loves carrots so much we were named after them. Our little wormy babies feed on carrots. Awesome. Too bad there's no such thing as a broccoli fly.
I guess no one wants to be named after bitter wannabe trees. You know who else loves carrots, Carrot Fly? Bugs Bunny. That's right, doc. In real life, carrots are too sweet for rabbits to eat every day. But they're not too sugary for humans. Their delicate, lightly sweet flavor makes them the best vegetable for delivering dips to your lips.
Carrots' mild flavor makes them the perfect veggie companion to ranch, hummus, blue cheese, Thousand Island, babaganoush, guacamole, and more. Americans eat a staggering 8 to 12 pounds of carrots per person every year and only about 4 to 5 pounds of broccoli. Have you tried driving a broccoli bus, smothered in French dressing into your mouth hole. It's like driving a tree into your face.
[LOUD THUD]
Time for a baby carrot.
CREW: That carrot is not a baby.
JADA PULLEY: It's the carrot parrot.
CREW: It's the carrot parrot.
JADA PULLEY: If this carrot isn't a baby, what is it?
CREW: Baby carrots are grown-up carrots that have been peeled and cut down to similar size. I know because I'm obsessed with carrots. They're a healthy snack for us parrots. Chewing them strengthens our jaws, and they are great for our eyes.
JADA PULLEY: Carrots are good for human eyes, too. That's because they're filled with something called beta-carotene, which is a pigment that gives carrots their orange hue. Our bodies turn beta-carotene into vitamin A, which helps our eyes take in light.
And carrots have over 20 times more beta-carotene than broccoli. Pro tip, if you really want to get the most out of a carrot, cook them. Your body can absorb vitamin A even more easily from hot carrots.
CREW: Hot carrots? Umm.
JADA PULLEY: Carrots can take the heat.
[SIZZLING]
And they don't just come in orange. They come in purple, red, yellow, and white, too. So go ahead. taste the carrot rainbow.
CREW: Hey, Jada, you're almost up. Are you still looking for a pre-show snack?
JADA PULLEY: Always.
CREW: Well, I baked this broccoli cake last night, and I'm looking for taste testers.
JADA PULLEY: Broccoli cake?
CREW: Hey-hey. Just kidding. Can you imagine? No, it's a carrot cake with cream cheese frosting.
JADA PULLEY: Phew! Yes, please. I'll enjoy a slice or five after the show. Carrots, they're nature's candy. They taste great raw, cooked, and baked goods, and dressed up in dip. And they're awesome for our bodies. I hope you're rooting for carrots to win this one, because let's face it, carrots take the cake.
MOLLY BLOOM: A delicious argument for carrots. I hope you won't mind sharing some of your carrot cake after the show. Kathryn, what stood out to you about Jada's Declaration of Greatness?
KATHRYN: I always heard that they helped your eyes. I didn't know how that worked. Teachers would always say to me, eat your carrots. You'll be-- you won't need glasses ever if you eat them. But now, actually learning about the carrot beta-carotene in the carrots, that actually makes sense why they help your eyes. Wow.
MOLLY BLOOM: Very cool. All right, Mary, it is time for your rebuttal. Tell us why carrots make nasty nibbles. And your time starts now.
MARY MACK: I pose to you that the smell of broccoli is actually an innate safety protocol saying, hey, don't forget you're cooking me on the stove. You don't want to burn the house down. Carrots don't even care. You can't smell a carrot. You could burn anything down with a carrot.
And then secondly, carrots, they might help your eyes. But it's a whole underground scheme they got going. You can poke your eye out with a carrot because it's so sharp. And then, ironically, you need more carrots to help your eyes. It's a vicious cycle. That's how they get you. I'm over my time.
CREW: What? We'll give you points for creativity. And that was straight up [? broccolies. ?] Like, carrots will not poke out your eyes.
MARY MACK: This is getting heated.
MOLLY BLOOM: This is a tough debate today. Kathryn, please give one point to the Declaration of Greatness you like best. and one point to the rebuttal that won you over. You get to decide what makes a winning argument.
Did one team's jokes make you laugh? Was the other team's argument unbeatable? Award your points, but don't tell us who they're going to. Have you made your decision?
KATHRYN: Yes, I have.
MOLLY BLOOM: Excellent. Jada and Mary, how are you two feeling so far.
MARY MACK: I'm nervous. I like carrots a little better now.
JADA PULLEY: Wow, you heard it here, folks.
MARY MACK: But also, my love for broccoli runs deep. And if I ever could be a spokeswoman for broccoli, I wouldn't even charge broccoli.
JADA PULLEY: That's really sweet of you. But broccoli cheddar soup running through your veins-- I'm lactose intolerant.
MARY MACK: Well, that's a whole-- that's another problem.
JADA PULLEY: I know.
MARY MACK: I'm so sorry.
JADA PULLEY: Too bad there's not as many dishes that broccoli would fit in good for. Carrots have so many that they could choose from.
MARY MACK: But I heard about all those dips you like. And think of how much more dip you can get on the broccoli for the babaganoush. Man.
JADA PULLEY: But at what cost?
[LAUGHTER]
MOLLY BLOOM: All right. It is time for a quick break. Head to your garden on a little culinary quest.
KATHRYN: And we'll be right back with more Smash Boom Best.
MOLLY BLOOM: You're listening to state of debate, home to rage and rhetoric and awe-inspiring argumentation.
TAYLOR LINCOLN: Hey there, debatinators. This is Taylor Lincoln, reigning queen of rebuttals. And here I am with my favorite rebut head, Todd Douglas.
TODD DOUGLAS: That's me. Taylor, have I told you about my new favorite reality show, Kitchen Stink, where blindfolded contestants have to identify the ingredients in stinky meals?
TAYLOR LINCOLN: Only about 643 times since yesterday. Why?
TODD DOUGLAS: Well, I wanted to show you this clip from last night's episode. It's got a really great example of a logical fallacy.
TAYLOR LINCOLN: Another logical fallacy? PU. Those are stinky mistakes that sabotage your arguments. Roll the tape, Todd.
[TAPE ROLLING]
PACO: OK, Dalton, I've prepared a real nostril tickler for you this round. Tell me what the ingredients. And no peeking.
DALTON: The sniffer is prime chef Paco. I can smell Brussels sprouts. So that means this dish definitely has pickled herring in it. Chefs always combine pickled herring and Brussels sprouts.
PACO: What?
DALTON: Yeah. Maybe it's a rule or something. All three dishes I've sniffed so far have had that combo-- the fishy sprout quiche. those crispy tempura sprout nuggets with herring dip, and that sprout and herring chowder you made. So I'm sure this dish has sprouts and herring, too.
PACO: But do you even smell herring?
DALTON: Well, no, but based on the pattern, I figured out it must be both of them, right? A rule is a rule. herring and sprouts, that's my final answer.
[BUZZER]
TAYLOR LINCOLN: Whoa, sounds like Dalton's argument is what's stinking up that kitchen.
TODD DOUGLAS: Dalton assumed that because he'd smelled pickled herring and Brussels sprouts together in chef Paco's previous dishes, that those two ingredients always go together. That's a classic cluster illusion, making an argument based on a pattern when that pattern could actually just be a coincidence.
TAYLOR LINCOLN: Dalton ignored the evidence right in front of his nose and inside his nose and stuck to that imaginary pattern.
TODD DOUGLAS: I don't know about you, but this is making me hungry. Want a snack?
TAYLOR LINCOLN: I'm not sure if I'm ever going to be hungry again, Todd.
TODD DOUGLAS: Okey-dokey. More anchovy bites for me.
TAYLOR LINCOLN: Yuck. You can have them in a separate table in a different room. We'll see you next time on. Stay up to date.
JOY DOLO: Brains On Universe is a family of podcasts for kids and their adults. Since you're a fan of Smash Boom Best, we know you'll love the other shows in our universe. Come on, let's explore.
[SONIC BOOM]
MARY MACK: Here we are in Brains On Universe, home to my favorite podcasts. Brains On, Smash Boom Best, Forever Ago. I found one. Forever Ago, the history show hosted by Joy Dolo.
[BEETHOVEN SYMPHONY]
MOLLY BLOOM: It was the early 1800s. Beethoven was busy composing new symphonies. Steam powered trains were brand new inventions. And a British naturalist named William Swainson was exploring the jungles of Britain.
MARY MACK: Uh, what a great show. Need more Forever Ago now.
JOY DOLO: Listen to Forever Ago wherever you get your podcasts.
MOLLY BLOOM: Smash Boom Best. You're listening to Smash Boom Best. I'm your host Molly Bloom.
KATHRYN: And I'm your judge, Kathryn.
MOLLY BLOOM: And we love getting debate suggestions from our listeners. Take a listen to this refreshing debate idea from Cal.
CAL: My name is Cal. And I'm from Missoula, Montana. My debate idea is lemons versus limes.
KATHRYN: I love a citrus showdown.
MOLLY BLOOM: We'll check back in at the end of this episode to see which side Cal thinks should win.
KATHRYN: And now it's back to our debate, broccoli versus carrots.
MOLLY BLOOM: That's right. And it's time for round two, the Micro Round.
[DING]
For the Micro Round challenge, each team has prepared a creative response to a prompt they received in advance. For Mary and Jada, the prompt was mascot audition. In this challenge, each side's vegetable must audition to be the mascot of a sports team. Mary went first last time. So, Jada, you're up. Show us why a carrot would make the best mascot.
JADA PULLEY: I heard you're looking for the perfect produce pick to be your team mascot. Look no further than me, a 6-foot talking, walking carrot. Not only am I easy on the eyes, I'm good for them, too. With my beta-carotenes on your side, you'll be able to see victory clear as day.
Unlike most other vegetables, I'm tough and sturdy enough to survive growing underground during brutal winter months. I'm one of the few vegetables that release more nutrients when cooked. So believe me when I say I can take the heat. And I'm even a master of the martial art of karate.
On top of that, people love me. When you want to get someone motivated, what do you give them? A carrot or a stick. That's right, a carrot. The stick is just a bonus. As a food, I can be juice, desserts, dinner, or a healthy raw snack. If I'm that versatile in the kitchen, imagine how dynamic I'll be cheering for your team.
By the way, my signature dance is where I'll get a bunch of my carrot buddies and we make some 24-carat Magic. We show Bruno Mars how it's done.
Anyway, I'm awesome. But don't let it go to my Carrot Top. I'm naturally sweet and truly pretty down to earth. That's where I grow, after all. Go carrots! Don't you like the sound of that? Pick me to be your mascot. We're perfect for each other. Let's be soil mates.
MOLLY BLOOM: Oh, man, I cannot wait to see the 24-carat dance team. Incredible. Mary, it is your turn. How would broccoli audition to be a sports mascot?
MARY MACK: Ciao. I'm broccoli. [ITALIAN] and the mascot you've been looking for. After all, I'm a team player. Use me for dips, hummus, soup, veggie trays. I'll make them all taste better. Put me with cauliflower, cold or hot. It is the toughest job, but I never complain. I simply bring cauliflower up to a higher level than it could reach on its own. You can do it, Cauliflower.
And if I can make cauliflower look good, think how good I can make your team look. Plus, you don't need to buy me a pom poms. My florets are pom poms. I shake them and cheer. Pronto, pronto, rapido, brava! Brava! I am proud. I grow up, up, out of the dirt, symbolic of the upward rise of your team was on your mascot.
Carrot? Ugh, they grow down, down, down [ITALIAN]. Boo. Gladiators, you know, the most fierce athletes in history, they ate broccoli. Need I say more? I will say one little thing more. If you don't like the color of my poms, just let me grow more, and they'll turn into yellow-flowered poms.
Or if you like a different color for your team, I come in white and purple varieties. See? I'm versatile. And I'm here to help your team look and feel their best. Go broccoli! Brava!
MOLLY BLOOM: Oh, man. Built-in pom poms? What a deal? All right, Kathryn, what did you like about those Micro Rounds?
KATHRYN: I never thought of broccoli looking like pom poms. I've only thought of looking like trees. And now I don't think I can ever go back. I'm going to see it, and I'm going to see pom poms. Wow.
But for carrots, again, I had no idea that there was more nutrients when you cook carrots. It's like all the strength just coming out of the carrot when it gets hot. And you get hot while playing in sports teams. Wow. This is going to be a tough one, guys.
MOLLY BLOOM: It is a tough one. But Kathryn, it's up to you. So please award a point. Don't tell us what's going to. Criteria, completely subjective and completely up to you. Have you made your decision?
KATHRYN: I have made my decision, Molly.
[BELL RINGS]
MOLLY BLOOM: Thank you, Kathryn, then it's time for our third round, the super stealthy Sneak Attack. This is our improvised round where debaters have to respond to a challenge on the spot. Today's Sneak Attack is called on Broadway.
Jada and Mary, we want you to come up with a song from a Broadway musical starring your side. Tell us a bit about who's singing, where the song appears in the show, and then sing us a sample of the music.
Is it a love ballad? Is it a solo performed by the lead during the most climactic moment of the show? Or maybe it's the dramatic finale? Jada went first last time. So, Mary, you're up. Take us to Broadway, broccoli style.
MARY MACK: OK, this is a little bit like the sound of music. The heroine and the love interest are in love and celebrating on the hillside, which is designed with different vegetables.
The hills are alive with the sound of broccoli. Don't step on the broccoli, dear. I want to eat it later. I love broccoli, and I love you, but not as much as broccoli.
I understand.
That's one of the big hits of this Broadway musical. It's a love scene.
MOLLY BLOOM: It's beautiful, so beautiful. What is the sound of broccoli?
MARY MACK: Mmm, Sound of broccoli is just a quiet notion--
JADA PULLEY: [BLOWS RASPBERRY]
[LAUGHTER]
MARY MACK: --in the wind that you're going to feel stronger later thanks to a solid digestive system. Thank you very much for reminding me, Jada. You can't survive life unless your GI tract is clean and running smoothly. Thank you, broccoli. Yet another safety protocol I forgot to mention.
MOLLY BLOOM: Excellent work. Jada, now it's your turn. Let's see if your tasty treat can win a Tony.
JADA PULLEY: This is actually from a yet-to-be-released musical. It is the sequel to Les Miserables. In this edition, there's a plot twist where they get to eat carrots. And all of a sudden, they're-- I forget the French for just super ecstatic and happy and healthy. But that's the title of this play, Healthy.
At the turning point, we see a field of carrots or at least the horizon [? whereinst ?] they grow. And they are singing a song together that introduces us to them.
MOLLY BLOOM: OK.
JADA PULLEY: Grow down, grow down, We're healthy for your brain. Grow down, grow down, We'll never need a grave. There's more. I forget the song.
[LAUGHTER]
But yeah, I only saw the musical once so--
MOLLY BLOOM: It's hard to remember.
JADA PULLEY: It's hard to remember, but it goes on.
MOLLY BLOOM: All right, Kathryn, you've heard these two excellent songs.
KATHRYN: I have.
MOLLY BLOOM: They've painted a picture of what these wonderful Tony Award-winning musicals would be like. But it's time to award a point to only one of them. Who is going to get it? Have you made your decision?
KATHRYN: I've made my decision.
[BELL DINGS]
MOLLY BLOOM: Perfect. Then it's time for our final round, the Final Six. In this round, each team will have just six words to sum up the glory of their side. Jada, let's hear your six words for carrots.
JADA PULLEY: Carrots, can't beat this healthy treat.
MOLLY BLOOM: Very good. All right, Mary, it's your turn. Let's hear your six words for broccoli.
MARY MACK: Broccoli cheese soup, broccoli cheese soup.
[LAUGHTER]
MOLLY BLOOM: Wow.
MARY MACK: Thank you, broccoli. I'm feeling great.
MOLLY BLOOM: OK, Kathryn, it is time to award a final point for this Final Six. Have you made your decision?
KATHRYN: Yes.
[BELL DINGS]
MOLLY BLOOM: Are you ready to crown one team the Smash Boom Best?
KATHRYN: I'm ready, Molly.
MOLLY BLOOM: Drum roll, please. The winner is--
KATHRYN: Broccoli.
MARY MACK: Yes! Thank you, Kathryn, so much. Thank you. Sorry, Jada I have some tissue for Jada.
MOLLY BLOOM: Oh, my goodness. Kathryn, what was your favorite moment of the debate today?
KATHRYN: I think it was the songs. I don't know who any of these people are, but I absolutely love it.
MOLLY BLOOM: It's incredible, so good.
MARY MACK: Thank you so much, Kathryn. I had nothing going for me. And now I have this. Thank you. I would like to invite carrots into the victory ring. It may be their only chance. It was a close one.
JADA PULLEY: There's no need to kick carrots while they're down.
MARY MACK: OK, I take it back. You're great.
JADA PULLEY: I was going to say congratulations. There's no other vegetable I'd rather lose to. Honestly, in preparing for this, carrots and broccoli, they're pretty-- broccoli is nutritious. I'll give it that. I do stand by what I said about they're bitter and just not it. But I can see why someone else would be swayed by your arguments.
MARY MACK: Thank you so much, Jada. And I am going to go buy more carrots because I need glasses. And I'm going to try to make it so I don't need as many glasses.
[LAUGHTER]
MOLLY BLOOM: Well, that is it for today's debate battle. Kathryn crowned broccoli the Smash Boom Best. But what about you?
KATHRYN: Head to smashboom.org and vote to tell us who you think won.
MOLLY BLOOM: Smash Boom Best is brought to you by Brains On and APM Studios. It's produced by me, Molly Bloom--
ANNA WEGGEL: Anna Weggel.
MOLLY BLOOM: --and--
ARON WOLDESLASSIE: Aron Woldeslassie.
MOLLY BLOOM: We had engineering help from Michael Osborne with sound design by Aron Woldeslassie Our editors are--
SHAHLA FARZAN: Shahla Farzan.
MOLLY BLOOM: --and--
SANDEN TOTTEN: Sanden Totten.
MOLLY BLOOM: And we had production help from the rest of the Brains On Universe team--
ROSIE DUPONT: Rosie DuPont.
RACHEL BREES: Rachel Brees.
ANNA GOLDFIELD: Anna Goldfield.
NICO GONZALEZ WISLER: Nico Gonzalez Wisler.
RUBY GUTHRIE: Ruby Guthrie.
LAUREN HUMBERT: Lauren Humbert.
JESS MILLER: Jess Miller.
JOSHUA RAY: Joshua Ray
MARC SANCHEZ: Marc Sanchez.
MOLLY BLOOM: --and--
CHARLOTTE TREVOR: Charlotte Trevor.
MOLLY BLOOM: Our executive producer is Beth Perlman and the APM Studios. Executives in charge are Chandra Kavati and Joanne Griffith. Our announcer is Marley Feuerwerker Otto. And we want to give a special thanks to Austin Cross and Taylor Kaufman. Mary, is there anyone you'd like to give a shout out to today?
MARY MACK: Shout out to broccoli. I'm very grateful for broccoli. And no one has helped me in my journey besides broccoli. Thank you, broccoli.
JADA PULLEY: That's very sad. Sorry.
MOLLY BLOOM: I hope you'll share your broccoli cheese soup recipe with us later. And how about you, Jada? Any special shout outs?
JADA PULLEY: I am going to thank carrots for being there for me. I'm a little sad about having lost this argument, so I'm just going to be crying into a bag of baby carrots later. But it's going to feel so sweet. But I would also like to thank my stuffed animal, my unnamed squishmallow, who will be there for me with hugs.
MOLLY BLOOM: The emotional support squishmallow is very important. And Kathryn, any special thanks or shout outs?
KATHRYN: I am not going to thank my vegetable. But I will be thanking my mom and my dad and especially my mom for that insane debate about tubing and water-skiing.
MOLLY BLOOM: Excellent work. Before we go, let's check in and see who Cal thinks should win the lemons versus limes debate.
CAM: I think lemons would win because you can make lemonade out of lemon.
MOLLY BLOOM: If you're between the ages of 13 and 18 and you'd like to be a judge, or if you're any age and you have an idea for a knock-down drag-out debate, head to smashboom.org/contact and drop us a line.
And make sure to subscribe to Brains On Universe on YouTube where you can watch animated versions of some of your favorite episodes. We'll be back with the new Smash Boom Best debate battle next week, surfing versus ice skating. Bye guys.
[THEME SONG]
(SINGING) Ooh, you have the Smash Boom Best
Ooh, put you through the test
Ooh, have the Smash Boom Best
Ooh, better than the rest
It's Samsh Boom Best
It's Smash Boom Best
MOLLY BLOOM: I need to go watch the rest of that musical Lays Healthy.
JADA PULLEY: Lays healthy.
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