Bermuda Triangle vs. Loch Ness

JED KIM: We have steel drums. We have tropical tunes.

SANDEN TOTTEN: Two words. Bagpipes.

[LAUGHTER]

SUBJECT 1: From the brains behind Brains On, it's Smash, Boom, Best.

SUBJECT 2: The show for loud mouths everywhere.

MOLLY BLOOM: Hello. I'm Molly Bloom, and this is Smash, Boom, Best, the show where we take two cool things, smash them together, and as you to decide which one is best. Before we reveal today's debate, let's meet our judge. We have Isa Camargo here from Orlando, Florida.

ISA CARMAGO: Hello.

MOLLY BLOOM: Isa, I am going to give you the honor of introducing today's topic. So if you can tell everybody what it is?

ISA CARMAGO: Sure. Today's Smash Boom battle will take on two famous places in the world-- the Bermuda Triangle versus Loch Ness.

MOLLY BLOOM: That's right. In one corner, we have the Bermuda Triangle, a mysterious patch of ocean where ships, planes, and plenty of people are said to have disappeared. And in the other, all the way across the Atlantic, we have Loch Ness, a Scottish lake best known for spooky sightings of a creature that's been dubbed the Loch Ness Monster. Which one is cooler, spookier, more mysterious? Today, we'll decide once and for all.

SUBJECT 3: I'd say Loch Ness because there's just-- I don't know. It's darker.

SUBJECT 4: Bermuda Triangle for sure all the way. Just disappearing planes and ships and everything.

SUBJECT 5: There are tons of planes, ships, crashes in that area.

SUBJECT 6: It's in my opinion, more mysterious.

SUBJECT 7: Definitely the Bermuda Triangle because things disappear there.

SUBJECT 8: I think the Loch Ness Monster is much more cooler.

SUBJECT 9: I like the legends about Nelly.

SUBJECT 10: There might be ancient creatures we think that are extinct still alive today.

MOLLY BLOOM: Myths, legends, and of course, facts are all in play to figure out which side is cooler. Isa, do you know much about either place?

ISA CARMAGO: I actually don't know anything about either place, so it's going to be kind of an adventure for me.

MOLLY BLOOM: Perfect. Well, you're a perfect blank slate-- not biased at all to judge this debate. And we have a couple of convincing chaps here who are going to harness the power of persuasion to try and pull you to their side. Arguing for that mysterious piece of ocean that triangulates between Florida, Puerto Rico, and Bermuda, we have team Bermuda Triangle represented by Jed Kim.

JED KIM: Hi, Isa.

MOLLY BLOOM: In one sentence, tell us why we should choose the Bermuda Triangle.

JED KIM: Well, you should definitely choose the Bermuda Triangle because as I mentioned, the weather here is so lovely. You will never want to leave, and there's a chance that you never might.

ISA CARMAGO: That sounds scary.

MOLLY BLOOM: Maybe not convinced quite yet. Now, traveling Northeast across the Atlantic, let's meet our debater for team Loch Ness, Sanden Totten.

SANDEN TOTTEN: Hey. Welcome to Loch Ness. It's misty. It's murky. The Loch Ness Monster-- is it a serpent? Is it a dinosaur? We don't know, but we do know it's extra spooky, and it's probably friends with Bigfoot. That's why you should pick it.

MOLLY BLOOM: Well, this is going to be a tough debate, I think. So let me set the ground rules first. Team Loch Ness and Team Bermuda Triangle are going to compete in four rounds of impassioned debate. The first round is Declaration of Greatness when both teams take us on a deep dive into the science, history, and lore of their side. Then, it's the Micro-Round, a creative challenge that our debaters have come prepared to compete in. Round 3 is Sneak Attack, a surprise challenge to keep them on their toes.

And our last round is the Final Six when both teams have one more chance to sway the judge in six words or less. Isa will award a point after each round to the team that she thinks did best. And listeners, we want you to keep score, too. Find yourself a notepad and something to write with so you can keep your own tally. We also have a poll on our website, smashboom.org, where you can cast your vote after you're done listening. All right, Isa. Are you ready?

ISA CARMAGO: I am so ready. Let's do this.

[LAUGHTER]

SANDEN TOTTEN: Bermuda Triangle, just like all those planes and ships, you're going down.

JED KIM: I've got nothing clever to say about the Loch Ness.

[LAUGHTER]

ISA CARMAGO: Roasted.

[LAUGHTER]

MOLLY BLOOM: OK. Well, this first round is where our debaters really have a chance to shine. We've given them the opportunity to take a deep dive for their side in order to persuade us.

SUBJECT 1: Declaration of Greatness.

MOLLY BLOOM: We flipped a coin, and Sanden, you're up first.

SANDEN TOTTEN: I'm going to start with a spooky tale, but I need to set the mood. Let's see. Oh.

[FIRE CRACKLING]

Campfire. Perfect. So this guy in Scotland is on a walk. He comes across a group of people with shovels. They look sad-- scared, even. The guy asks, "What's going on here?" They say, "We're burying a body." It's a man. They say he was swimming nearby when something happened. They say he was attacked by a monster.

So the first guy-- he hears this, and he maybe believes it. Maybe he doesn't. But either way, he thinks these people are freaked out, so he comes up with a plan. He tells a friend walking with him, "Hey, why don't you go for a quick swim?" And his friend for whatever reason says, "Sure." And in the time it takes to say cannonball, something lunges out. It's the creature. It's real.

But the guy on shore? He's religious, so he keeps his cool. He makes the sign of the cross and yells out, "Do not touch the man! Go back at once!" Just like that, the beast freezes like it's being held in place by ropes. Then, it leaves. This isn't a scene from a movie or a TV show. It's actually from a book written 1,500 years ago all about Saint Columba. He's the religious guy from the story.

It's important because it's the first recorded instance of the Legend of the Loch Ness Monster. Since then, hundreds, maybe thousands of people claim to have seen the beast affectionately known as Nessie.

SUBJECT 11: It was huge.

SUBJECT 12: It looked like a serpent.

SUBJECT 11: I thought it was a dinosaur.

SUBJECT 12: That thing stole my lunch.

SUBJECT 11: That thing stole my boyfriend.

SUBJECT 13: It had fangs the size of kitchen knives.

SUBJECT 14: Whatever it was, it was definitely cooler than the Bermuda Triangle.

SANDEN TOTTEN: I'll admit there's no solid evidence that the monster exists. It's likely just legend. But the Loch can still beat the Bermuda Triangle because the Loch itself is just so cool. For starters, it's ginormous. 22 miles long and so, so deep-- so deep you could actually stand a 60 story building in it. That's a lot of room for mystery.

Oh, and did I mention that it sits on top of an active earthquake fault? Whoa. And how's this for magical? Scientists have found so many unique species nearby, they've actually dubbed it a lost world. Dun, dun, dun! Researchers found Juniper shield bugs, blood red slave-making ants, and what seems to be Scotland's largest population of strawberry spiders, which are actual spiders that have abdomens that look like strawberries.

What is this, Hogwarts? Nope. Just mind blowing [INAUDIBLE] forest near Loch Ness. And yeah, people pretend the Bermuda Triangle is some kind of wormhole, time warp thingy. Whatever. Loch Ness is like a real life time machine. It's all in the lake's mud or sediment. Since the lake is so deep, the bottom isn't disturbed by winds or boats.

So unlike other places, stuff that sinks in the Loch stays put. Over millennia, layer after layer of pollen, plants, dirt fell to the floor of the lake and built up creating a time capsule of glorious gunk. In fact, scientists studying the Loch's sediments traced the history of the area back 10,000 years to the end of the Ice Age.

They even found radioactive elements from the 1986 Chernobyl nuclear disaster. And I mean, if there were a monster, that radiation would only make it more powerful. After all, that's how Godzilla got its start.

MOLLY BLOOM: Sanden, there are some pretty convincing points there. Now, Isa, what stood out for you in Sanden's argument?

ISA CARMAGO: I'm so scared.

[LAUGHTER]

MOLLY BLOOM: You spooked her.

ISA CARMAGO: While he was saying that, the room next to our room-- the lights turned off. And I was like, oh my goodness. I got so scared. I think my favorite fact from that statement was when he said it's so deep that if you stuck a 60 story building in it-- that's how deep it was.

MOLLY BLOOM: That is really amazing.

ISA CARMAGO: That's probably my favorite.

MOLLY BLOOM: Yeah, that is amazing. Well, Jed, it is time for your rebuttal. You have 30 seconds for a counterargument. On your mark, get set, go.

JED KIM: Well, Sanden, I will admit that it is pretty intriguing that you could stand a 60 story building in the Loch Ness. That's pretty deep. That's cute. We'll see how deep the Bermuda Triangle gets. If the best thing about this is that you can get buried alive in radioactivity, then I think you need to work on your sales pitch. And finally, that legend where it all began, where somebody was burying a body? Maybe they should have called the cops.

[LAUGHTER]

SANDEN TOTTEN: OK. First of all, that was like 1,500 years ago. I don't think that the cops were easy to reach back then. With what phone would you call them?

JED KIM: Call the bobbies.

[LAUGHTER]

SANDEN TOTTEN: Again, no phones back then, so calling wasn't really an option.

JED KIM: You could pull out your bagpipes and signal them.

[BAGPIPES PLAYING]

SANDEN TOTTEN: All right. Well, I mean, to me all those things are pluses, because I like a good spooky mystery.

MOLLY BLOOM: Well, Jed, it is now your turn to go deep.

JED KIM: All right. Let's do this.

MOLLY BLOOM: Yeah. Let's hear what you've got.

JED KIM: Loch Ness? More like Shlock Ness. If you want eerie mystery, you don't get spookier than the Bermuda Triangle, a patch of ocean that stretches from Miami to Puerto Rico to Bermuda. Hundreds of ships and planes have gone missing within its borders, and no one knows why.

Weirdness has been reported in the triangle going back hundreds of years. In 1492, Christopher Columbus sailing the ocean blue noted strange lights while his ships were in the triangle.

CHRISTOPHER COLUMBUS: What the--

JED KIM: And they got some strange compass readings there, too.

CHRISTOPHER COLUMBUS: Santa Maria! What is wrong with this stupid thing?

JED KIM: Fast forward to 1918. The USS Cyclops, a Navy fuel ship, disappeared off the coast of Barbados along with about 300 crew members. It never even sent out a distress signal. Most famous of all, though, is the mystery of Flight 19. Five torpedo bombers out on a training mission. Routine, but they get lost. The squad leader radios in.

PILOT: Both of my compasses are out.

JED KIM: They tried to head back to Miami, but they couldn't figure out which way to turn. They kept heading in the wrong direction. Their fuel ran low.

PILOT: The whole plane's closed up tight. We'll have to ditch unless landfall.

JED KIM: They were never seen again. Oh, yeah. And one of the rescue planes that went out searching for them also vanished. What the what? These and many other reported disappearances are why many people call this swath of ocean the Devil's Triangle.

[TRIANGLE PLAYING]

Can we make that sound deadlier?

[DISTORTED TRIANGLE PLAYING]

Nice. All sorts of theories have popped up to explain what's behind the disappearances-- disturbances in the Earth's magnetic field, explosive methane gas pockets, defensive countermeasures from the lost city of Atlantis, UFOs. Here's the thing, though. Scientists and investigators have looked into the records and found a lot of the mysteries were simply misreported.

And weather can explain a lot of the actual losses. After all, a lot of hurricanes cut right through the Bermuda Triangle. The kicker, though, is that the number of accidents in the Triangle is pretty much average for any part of the ocean, so there's nothing mystically special about the Bermuda Triangle.

But there are plenty of real things that make it much superior to some musty old lake in Scotland. For one thing, the Bermuda Triangle contains some of the deepest underwater trenches on the planet. Because of that, the US Navy has facilities there to research and test its underwater combat systems-- submarines, weapons, sonar, things like that.

The deep sea also hides a lot of mysterious life. About a dozen years ago, scientists sent divers and nets down three miles below the ocean surface and collected more than 1,000 organisms. They found completely new species-- things like wing-footed snails, pulsing jellyfish, swimming worms. And by taking repeat measurements of some of the tiny organisms they collected, scientists will be able to keep tabs on how the climate is changing.

So how long do you suppose it took scientists to do all this extremely valuable collecting? 10 years, 50 years? No, 20 days. Meanwhile, people have been looking for the Loch Monster for nearly a century, and they can't even find that one single species. I mean, could Loch Ness shock less?

Finally, can I just point out that the Bermuda Triangle has the name Bermuda in it? We're talking about a subtropical paradise here-- sandy beaches, crystal clear blue ocean, a gulfstream current that keeps things oh so warm and lovely. This is swimsuit country. You can snorkel. You can scuba dive. You can live out the rest of your life without wearing long pants. I rest my case. Also Sanden is wrong, and he smells bad.

MOLLY BLOOM: Oh, man. There are a lot of good points in there. Isa, what stood out for you?

ISA CARMAGO: I actually have a quick question. Did Christopher Columbus discover the Bermuda Triangle, or did he just find it after it was already discovered?

JED KIM: He sailed through the region that we now know today as the Bermuda Triangle, but the Bermuda Triangle didn't really catch on as an idea until about the mid-1900s.

MOLLY BLOOM: Excellent question, Isa. So is there a fact that Jed gave that you thought was the most interesting?

ISA CARMAGO: Actually, I don't think I have one because that was all pretty interesting.

JED KIM: Yes!

[LAUGHTER]

ISA CARMAGO: I never said I was going to give a point to you. I never said I was going to give a point to Loch Ness either, so you'll never know.

[INTERPOSING VOICES]

MOLLY BLOOM: Keeping the cards close to the vest. OK, Sanden. It's your turn to rebut that chock full of interesting facts statement. Are you ready? You have 30 seconds, and go.

SANDEN TOTTEN: OK. So first, which would you rather see? A mysterious and beautiful lake where you might spot a monster or a triangle where your keys might disappear or something? Bermuda Triangle-- it's literally flyover country. People fly over it all the time, whereas 350,000 people made a point of visiting Loch Ness in 2015. I'm just saying. People put it on their bucket lists. I don't know if flying over a swath of ocean fits the bill. Also, the whole mystery of the Bermuda Triangle could have been solved if boats and planes used Waze. Boom.

MOLLY BLOOM: Time. OK. Wow. You guys gave Isa a lot to chew over. So now that you've heard both-- the arguments and the rebuttals, Isa-- I want you to think about it and give a point to the team that swayed you the most. Don't say it out loud. And listeners--

ISA CARMAGO: All right. I got it.

MOLLY BLOOM: That was quick. So listeners, you do the same on your score sheet, and feel free to pause and hash it out with a buddy if you need help deciding. And you can head to smashboom.org to share your big opinions, debate ideas, or to just give us a virtual high five.

ISA CARMAGO: And if you like the show, please help us grow. Just rate and review us or tell a friend.

MOLLY BLOOM: Yeah. Like next time you're talking to your friend at your locker, you two can be maybe a little too loud and say, "That Smash, Boom, Best podcast is so good, right?"

ISA CARMAGO: Oh, and your friends could say, "For sure. It's the best. I can't believe they chose [BLEEP] as the winner between Loch Ness and the Bermuda Triangle."

MOLLY BLOOM: Yeah. And then you're all, "I am so glad Smash, Boom, Best is available in places like Apple Podcasts, Google Play, and Spotify."

ISA CARMAGO: And then she'd say, "Or wherever you'd like to download your podcasts."

MOLLY BLOOM: And then the bell would ring, and it's off to social studies. Bye.

ISA CARMAGO: Bye.

MOLLY BLOOM: Exactly.

[LAUGHTER]

Don't go anywhere. We'll be right back with more Smash, Boom, Best.

[MUSIC PLAYING]

This is Smash, Boom, Best, the show about showdowns. Have you ever thought about who would win this battle?

ELLIOTT: My idea is donuts versus cupcakes.

MOLLY BLOOM: That match up was sent to us by Elliott from Springfield, Virginia. We'll give him a call at the end of the show to see who he thinks would win. Now, we've already heard one smashing round, but no side can claim mic drop status just yet.

It's time for Team Bermuda Triangle and Loch Ness to get creative in the Micro-Round. We let both sides know about this Micro-Round in advance so they had time to prepare their best commercials. Jed and Sanden, are you both ready to sell out and go commercial?

JED KIM: I am so ready.

SANDEN TOTTEN: I've been waiting for someone to ask me.

ISA CARMAGO: I'm really excited to hear this.

MOLLY BLOOM: All right. Sanden, you are up first. Roll it.

SUBJECT 15: The sun, sandy beaches, warm ocean waters. Oh, boring. This year, ditch that Bermuda snoozefest and come to where the real excitement is-- beautiful Loch Ness. Located in the Highlands of Scotland, we have it all. You want islands? Come see Cherry Island, the Loch's only crannog which is the cool way of saying an island made by humans.

It once had a castle on it. Speaking of castles, Loch Ness is home to Urquhart Castle, one of the majestic structures that inspired the animators of Pixar's movie Brave. What did the Bermuda Triangle inspire? A movie about yawns, probably. Who cares?

Like swimming? Maybe you can beat Brenda Sherratt's record. She was the first to swim the entire length of the Loch. It only took a relaxing 31 hours and 27 minutes, so get going. And what trip would be complete without a cruise on one of our many ships? Maybe you'll spot our biggest celebrity Nessie. Oh, there she is.

NESSIE: Please, no pictures.

SUBJECT 16: Aw, I really wanted a selfie.

SUBJECT 15: So if you want to make your vacation disappear, go to Bermuda. But if you want your boredom to disappear, come to lovely Loch Ness.

MOLLY BLOOM: Isa, are you ready to book your travel to Scotland?

SANDEN TOTTEN: Operators are standing by.

ISA CARMAGO: I just have one thing to say. When it said that the person-- it took them a relaxing 31 hours to swim? I don't get why you said relaxing because how is that relaxing? Just imagine swimming for 31 hours.

MOLLY BLOOM: Maybe if you love swimming, nothing you'd rather be doing for 31 hours.

JED KIM: Isa, this sounds like this vacation is going to be a lot of work.

ISA CARMAGO: I love swimming, but I don't think I'd swim for 31 hours.

SANDEN TOTTEN: It was just a suggestion.

MOLLY BLOOM: Just a suggestion.

ISA CARMAGO: Because at the beginning I would be, OK. I got this. This is going to be the best thing that ever happened to me. And at the end, I'm going to be like, water! I need water, food, water, anything to help me survive!

MOLLY BLOOM: At the end, you can hang out in a castle, hmm? Maybe? I don't know. Well, let's see if Jed can convince you. You're up next, Jed. Lights, camera, action.

SUBJECT 17: Your history paper's due, but you haven't started. Your mom's furious at you for no reason, and your crush just saw you pick out your wedgie. Sometimes, you just really need to disappear.

[MUSIC PLAYING]

Well, there is no better place to get lost than in the beautiful, sunny Bermuda Triangle. Let your troubles crash land into our crystal clear waters. You'll never see them again. Or maybe you just need people to think you've vanished. They'll blame crazy conspiracy theories for your absence while you laugh from your lounge chair on our white sand beaches.

Act now. It is just a quick plane, ship, or UFO ride to this Devil's Triangle of a good time. And remember, scientists say the chances something terrible will happen to you on your way aren't statistically significant. The Bermuda Triangle. It's probably fine here.

MOLLY BLOOM: Oh, man. Isa, does that have you calling your travel agent?

ISA CARMAGO: I was laughing so hard during that commercial. Because when they said, want to get lost? Go to Bermuda Triangle, the best place to get lost.

MOLLY BLOOM: Oh, man. Well, Isa, it's time to mark down a point to either Team Bermuda Triangle or Team Loch Ness. And listeners, you mark a point, too. Did you decide, Isa?

ISA CARMAGO: Yes.

MOLLY BLOOM: Moving on to Round 3, it's time for a Sneak Attack. Our debaters have no idea what they're in for because this round is always a surprise. Are you ready, guys?

SANDEN TOTTEN: Yes.

JED KIM: I was born ready.

MOLLY BLOOM: All right. Today's challenge is spelling bee.

SANDEN TOTTEN: Oh, not my strong suit.

JED KIM: Oh, man.

MOLLY BLOOM: How do you spell victory? By stumping your opponent with some tricky words. We want you to come up with three words related to your side that you'd like your opponent to try to spell. We'll see how much opposition research you did leading up to this debate. And while we're waiting, we have some lovely music for you.

SUBJECT 18: (SINGING) Oh, Loch Ness, Bermuda Triangle. Oh, Loch Ness, Bermuda Triangle. Oh, Loch Ness, Bermuda Triangle. Hey, is that Nessie? Oh, Loch Ness, Bermuda Triangle. Oh, Loch Ness, Bermuda Triangle. You might get lucky, or you might disappear.

MOLLY BLOOM: Sanden started the first round. So Jed, why don't you give Sanden a word first?

JED KIM: It's a name. I want you to spell Barbados.

SANDEN TOTTEN: Barbados. B-A-R-B-A-D-O-S.

JED KIM: Yeah.

MOLLY BLOOM: Correct. Excellent work, Sanden. What is your word for Jed?

SANDEN TOTTEN: So I mentioned, there are traces of radioactive elements at the bottom of Loch Ness from Chernobyl. So that's your word. Chernobyl.

JED KIM: Chernobyl. C-H-E-R-N-O-B-Y-L.

SANDEN TOTTEN: That is correct.

[LAUGHTER]

MOLLY BLOOM: All right, Jed. Do you have another stumper for Sanden?

JED KIM: Yes, I do. One of the things that they think might have caused these disappearances in the triangle? Something called geomagnetism.

SANDEN TOTTEN: Geomagnetism. So I'm thinking geo, like geographic. G-E-O-M-A-G-N-E-T-I-S-M?

JED KIM: Yeah.

SANDEN TOTTEN: Whoa. Yes.

MOLLY BLOOM: You guys are doing well so far. OK, Sanden. Try to stump Jed.

SANDEN TOTTEN: OK. I got one for you, Jed. A lot of people think the Loch Ness monster might be the last surviving member of the species of giant marine reptile called a plesiosaur. So that's your word. Plesiosaur.

JED KIM: You know, I once was really obsessed with the Loch Ness and plesiosaurs, and I thought that was definitely what the Loch Monster was. And I read that word over and over again, but it has been a long time since I've read that word. Plesiosaur. P-L-E-I-S-I-O-S-A-U-R. Plesiosaur.

SANDEN TOTTEN: Is that your final answer?

JED KIM: Yes?

[BUZZER]

What?

ISA CARMAGO: So close.

MOLLY BLOOM: You were so close. It's P-L-E-S-I-O-S-A-U-R. So that was incorrect. Jed, you have one more chance to try to stump Sanden.

JED KIM: All right. This might seem easy at first, but I'm gonna see [INAUDIBLE]. One of the new species that was found? Wing-footed snail.

SANDEN TOTTEN: Wing-footed snail? W-I-N-G dash F-O-O-T-E-D space S-N-A-I-L? That's it.

JED KIM: Yeah. I thought that dash was going to get you.

SANDEN TOTTEN: Oh! That's like Spider-Man. You put a dash in there.

JED KIM: I didn't know he'd be good at grammar.

[LAUGHTER]

SANDEN TOTTEN: All right, Jed. Your final word. The Loch water itself is incredibly murky and hard to see through because there's all of this peat from the hillsides that have drained into the Loch. How do you spell peat?

JED KIM: My best friend's name growing up was Pete, but I also know that's not how you spell this. Peat is spelled P-E-A-T.

SANDEN TOTTEN: That's right. And peat is a soil-like material that you'll find in the Loch, and Jed correctly spelled it.

JED KIM: But I missed one.

SANDEN TOTTEN: You have been de-peated.

[LAUGHTER]

MOLLY BLOOM: OK, Isa. You get to decide. Who did better in that round? And it's not necessarily based on who spelled all the words correctly.

JED KIM: Oh, really?

MOLLY BLOOM: It is based on who maybe you think it should be.

SANDEN TOTTEN: But it should be. Come on.

MOLLY BLOOM: --who did the best spelling. Isa, it is up to you. So you give a point to which side you think performed better in that round.

ISA CARMAGO: OK. I think I got it.

MOLLY BLOOM: Now, we are nearing the end of this transatlantic word wrangle, and tensions are high. Sanden and Jed, this is your final round, your last chance to persuade Isa and everybody listening that your team is the best. It's time for the Final Six. You have just six more words to win Isa's vote. Jed, let's start with you.

JED KIM: Enjoy Loch Ness, that mud hole.

[LAUGHTER]

MOLLY BLOOM: Short and sweet. OK. Sanden, take it away.

SANDEN TOTTEN: Monsters and mystery? Loch Ness wins.

MOLLY BLOOM: OK. Isa, so you heard your six word closing statements from each contestant. I want you to award a point and add it to the rest of the tally.

ISA CARMAGO: OK.

MOLLY BLOOM: All right. Tell us, who are you choosing as today's winner? Team Loch Ness or Team Bermuda Triangle?

ISA CARMAGO: It's a tie.

[GASPS]

JED KIM: What?

SUBJECT 1: Sudden death.

MOLLY BLOOM: This race is too close to call, so we're going into an extra sudden death round. Isa, I'm going to have both teams answer a question, and I want you to decide who has the best answer. OK?

ISA CARMAGO: OK.

MOLLY BLOOM: The question is, why would your side be the best place to host a party? Sanden, you're up first.

SANDEN TOTTEN: Have a party at Loch Ness in the castle where you're overlooking the lake. And you're going to have all your friends, and you can dress Game of Thrones theme if you want. Not only will you have great food, sausage, maybe some haggis-- there'll be a bagpipe player.

Maybe the monster itself will come visit your party and show some sick dance moves that only a serpent from a Loch could do. And you could all take pictures with the monster, and post it and tag and everything will be soups gels because they're like, whoa, you were with a monster? That's so cool. So yeah. Have your party at Loch Ness.

MOLLY BLOOM: OK. Pretty convincing. Jed, your turn.

JED KIM: I mean, I cannot think of a better place to have an epic party then in the Bermuda Triangle. You've got blue ocean water. You've got sandy beaches that stretch for miles. You've got the perfect weather. You don't have some moss-covered mystery--

NESSIE: Hey.

JED KIM: --rolling around saying, hey, do you want to look at me? I might show up at your party, or I might totally flake out.

NESSIE: Uh, never mind.

JED KIM: What you can expect from the Bermuda Triangle is a good time, and you can invite everyone. You can invite that kid you don't like, and maybe that kid will disappear. There's always the chance.

MOLLY BLOOM: OK, Isa. You've heard both arguments. I want you to award one more point, and now let us know who won this tie breaker.

ISA CARMAGO: OK. The winner is Loch Ness.

SANDEN TOTTEN: Yeah!

[LAUGHTER]

Nessie's proud of you. Nessie's really happy. I can see her doing her little dance in the water, like [VOCALIZING].

JED KIM: Well, I hope you enjoy your raincoat vacation.

ISA CARMAGO: I will.

[LAUGHTER]

MOLLY BLOOM: Well, but it was clearly a close debate because we had a tie originally. So this was not an easy decision, was it, Isa?

ISA CARMAGO: It was not.

MOLLY BLOOM: So well done, both Jed and Sanden.

ISA CARMAGO: Well debated.

SANDEN TOTTEN: Yeah. I mean, look. I would definitely go check out the Bermuda Triangle after I visited Loch Ness, crossed that off my list. It would be like third or fourth, maybe-- it's definitely in the top 10. Definitely the top 10.

JED KIM: That's very nice. I would also visit the Loch Ness if I were really, really sad and wanted to be even sadder.

[LAUGHTER]

ISA CARMAGO: Oh!

MOLLY BLOOM: All right, listeners. Isa has crowned Team Loch Ness the Smash, Boom, Best, but how about you? Head to our website, smashboom.org, and vote. You can see if the public agrees with our judge.

ISA CARMAGO: Vote Loch Ness.

MOLLY BLOOM: While you're there, you can check out the rest of our Smash Boom Besties, and that's it for this globetrotting test of tongues. Before we sign off, let's give Elliot a call. He's the listener who suggested a cupcakes versus donuts match up.

ELLIOTT: I picked it because I really like both, and I want to see who likes what.

MOLLY BLOOM: Which side would you choose to be the winner in donuts versus cupcakes?

ELLIOTT: Donuts because they're yummy. They are OK for breakfast. You mostly get to choose toppings.

MOLLY BLOOM: And remember, if you have an idea for the perfect showdown, visit smashboom.org and tell us all about it. Smash, Boom, Best is brought to you by the good people at Brains ON and American Public Media.

SUBJECT 19: It's produced by Elyssa Dudley, Mark Sanchez, Sanden Totten, and Molly Bloom.

SUBJECT 20: We had engineering help from Cory [INAUDIBLE], Bill Johnson, and Jeff Peters.

MOLLY BLOOM: And a very special thanks to the voice of our hold music, Brenda Everson, and our announcer, Marlee [INAUDIBLE]. Jed and Sanden, is there anyone you want to especially thank?

SANDEN TOTTEN: Yeah. Shout out to my Loch Ness players. Taylor Kaufman, Michael Rowe, Ben [INAUDIBLE], Carla Javier, Adrian Hill, Jennifer Miller, Euan Kerr, Frank Stoltze, Kate Moose, and Peter Cox.

JED KIM: I would like to thank the professional Rema [INAUDIBLE], Kyle Stokes, and I need to thank the excellent voice acting team of Kevin, Elliott, and Eloise Thompson.

MOLLY BLOOM: And I would like to thank Jill Ferris, Lauren D, and John Lambert. That's it for this episode of Smash, Boom, Best. We'll be back soon with another debate battle. See you later.

ISA CARMAGO: Bye, everyone!

JED KIM: Thanks for listening.

SANDEN TOTTEN: Thanks so much.

[MUSIC PLAYING]

SUBJECT 21: (SINGING) You're the smash, boom, best. Oh, put you through the test. You're the smash, boom, best, better than the rest. It's Smash, Boom, Best. It's Smash, Boom, Best.